I'm happily infatuated with him. I want him always. Just laying beside him nearly naked with him nearly naked is enough in and of itself to make me wet. I love spending the night with him and just listening to him talk about anything and everything. I love learning about what makes him tick.
While he's able to talk my ear off while we are together, not so much when we are apart. It's tough getting a hold of him via the telephone and he rarely responds to text messages. I've got men that I have absolutely no desire for in far off countries who respond to text messages and facebook emails better than he does. Or young young men (24 yrs old), thinking they are man enough for me promising me their sexual prowess could equal that of my 43 year old lover.
I want Sean. That's who I want to be with and that's the only one I've been with since late April and that day at Mazzios.
I'm happily infatuated even when his lack of texting ability or picking up the phone frustrates the living hell out of me. I fear for the moment I get pissed enough and just stop calling, stop texting, and stop commenting. Will he respond or just write me off?
It's more than just sex. The sex is wonderful even sometimes amazing. Yes it is that good. But a message from him makes me smile. Being with him makes me smile. Going out on an actual date (what's that?) with him makes me smile.
Not that I need him to be happy, I'm not that unstable, nor do I need him beside me to have a good nights sleep. I sleep alright with or without someone next to me, though sleeping with takes some adjustments.
I got to see him recently. It was supposed to be my weekend without children, but my ex-husband (who is evil) bailed on me. I had some pre-birthday plans to hopefully see a concert with my man of a local band and then hopefully spend the rest of weekend wrapped up in Sean's arms. My ex screwed that up.
Anyways, I got a little miffed at Sean on Friday because I hadn't heard from him in awhile. Found out later he'd collapsed (sleep of the exhausted) and not woken up until 3 in the morning. I did text him that I missed him and was rewarded with a text message conversation.
Now I have read that when you're with someone communicating only via text equals just a booty call type of relationship, actual phone calls equal a real relationship, so I've been calling more (though not texting less).
On Saturday night after work I did see him. It was a surprise visit. I tried calling before hand but he wasn't paying attention to his phone. So I came over unannounced, to a point. He walking out of his apartment as I was pulling up.
I find that man very attractive, he's 10 1/2 years my senior but I don't think he looks like it to me. He's taller than me by a few inches. I gather him to be a bit over 6 foot while I'm 5'7". He's got receding hairline, that I don't mind kind of in the way I find Patrick Stewart fucking hot (aka Jean-Luc Picard). He keeps his hair very short, almost military style. I got to give him a haircut recently, give him a nice buzz cut, which I kind of enjoyed, it was a tiny bit of a turn on. Think of Phenomenon (1996) when Kyra Sedgwick's character gives John Travolta's character a haircut.
I also love Sean's eyes, he has lovely blue eyes and a nice mouth that I love to see when he smiles.
Now what really turns me on is his arms. I've always loved a man's defined arms. Not a muscle bound testosterone junkie but definition. Nice arms you can rub your hands over. Sean has arms like these, I like to touch his arms.
I could go on because there is another lovely body part of his that turns me on to no end, that body part that I love to grasp, stroke, and suck. That body part I want to feel inside me anytime I'm around him.
So, I drove up to Sean's apartment as he was leaving. He didn't look mad or disappointed to see me. He was going to go see a movie, we discussed the movie and the options of seeing it together along with my children.
We stood outside for a time and talked in the lovely Oklahoma heat, it was six or seven o'clock but still rather hot.
Finally we went inside to talk. We discuss various things such as the new changes his work was facing and the stupid decisions big corporations tend to make. He also told me things about his past and even a story of a temporary lover that could've been 'the one'. Even though in the past have to admit to a tiny dose of jealousy hitting me, but apparently her stupidity and loss is my gain.
At one point he did tell me he got my text from the night before declaring I missed him. He gave me one of those kisses that make my toes curl. With that kiss I wanted to take him into his bedroom and do all sorts of naughty things to him, but he'd talked about the possibility of earlier food poisoning of sorts, so I didn't want to risk the add on of new assaults to the stomach.
I did end up leaving regrettably after discussions, I didn't want to and renewed my own anger at my ex-husband. I want Sean even now, maybe more and my desire wasn't helped by the dream I had this morning.
I dreamt about the morning we had about two weeks ago. It was the weekend before July 4th. Sean was gone for the most of the day on Friday with family. I think I ended up with either the day or part of the afternoon off from work. I wanted to do something that day, but he was busy with family way up until 1 o'clock at night.
I was preparing to go out to see some friends and hang out, but gave them all rainchecks in order to hang out with my man. He sat at my feet while I sat in his recliner and we watched a movie on television. I forget now wish movie we watched. I rubbed on his back and his head. I like to touch him, anywhere he'll let me.
Eventually, we wound up in the bedroom. I think he believes it's my only goal to get him into the bedroom. I adore just being with him, if I get laid in the process it's a bonus. Over the last two weeks that night has gotten fuzzy in my head. I think we talked and I know we ended up making love.
I want to say I went down on him for a short time. After stroking him for a time I had to have him in my mouth. I love to hear his noises when I take him into my mouth. Most men don't realize the absolute control they are giving away by letting a woman go do on them. There is a power gained by pleasing a man with your mouth, especially if you know what you're doing.
I love to hear him and I also love it when he moves my hair for a better view. I like being watched while I devour his cock. As of yet I haven't taken him all the way to the finish line with my mouth. I plan to finish him off with my mouth in the near future and swallow him all up.
Usually he ends up wanting sex before I can finish and I never argue. He asks me if I want his cock. He asks me if I've been missing his cock. I so adore his cock and I miss it every moment it's not inside of me.
At this point I climbed on top of him. I fucked him for awhile. I like the feeling of riding him. I like to lay on top of him and then I love to sit up on him and truly ride him. Feeling him penetrate me deeper and deeper.
He makes me cum, repeatedly. I know eventually we ended up doggy style. That's how we usually end up. Doggy style seems to be the best way for us to cum the hardest.
"Sean, you fuck me so good." I told him. I love to feel him push inside me from behind and to feel him slap my ass, even when he leaves a bit of a mark.
We did end up fully satiated and falling asleep in each other's arms.
We cuddle at night. I'm not used to cuddling, Sean's a different sort because most men don't like cuddling. I usually end up cuddling with a man to watch a movie or something and then once the sex is done we go to different sides of the bed. The most touching is a hand placed on a backside. Sean seems to like my head on his chest or we both love to spoon.
I find spooning to be an effective weapon when I want more sex. If I can turn my ass into him and just move just so, sometimes I'm pleased to get a second go around.
Now this night I was truly exhausted and fell asleep without much effort, plus good sex makes falling asleep that much easier.
I was woken in the morning with Sean wrapped around me. We were spooning with my backside against his front, even though I wasn't trying to use my weapon it worked without my knowledge. I woke with him breathing softly on my neck and lazily playing with my breasts. I could feel his firmness against my ass.
I wanted him instantly. I turned a bit and let my legs fall open. He caressed my center. He let me get to a start of a building orgasm and then let his hand fall away. I think he's afraid of me soaking his bed again. I really want him to let me climax with his fingers, I can hold back the urge to gush, it's harder with someone else than it is by myself, but I really love climaxing with someone else's hand. I have since purchase a waterproof blanket that I plan on bringing with me the next time I see him.
He didn't have to put my hand on his hard cock, I found it without guidance. I do love his cock. It's perfect. Just the right size, I'd guesstimate about 7 1/2 inches give or take (my pussy is not the most accurate of measuring equipment). The width is just right, nether to skinny nor to wide. His head creates a nice mushroom like top that feels great on my insides.
We pulled off my panties and he took me from behind, on our sides. I like this position. It's kind of a perfect early morning position and it allows the guy access to rub the clit while he's fucking.
For some reason the early morning fuck is a bit more intense because the need to pee is there. The need to pee makes the orgasm just that much more intense.
He fucked me from behind laying down, then he fucked me missionary style. I like pushing up into him as he's pushing into me. I'm not one to lay like corpse I want to move into him and point him in the right direction so I can cum too.
I believe at one point my legs were up on his shoulders and perhaps a pillow went under my ass. He fucked me good and hard from on top. I could feel him slide in and out of me, deeper and deeper. Then he wanted me on my stomach.
I flipped over and put my ass in the air. Deftly he put his nice hard cock right in between my lips and slid nicely into my pussy. I love to feel him enter me, to push inside of me. There is no better feeling in the world. I can imagine it even now.
We fucked hard and fast. He pulled my hips into him and fucked back with equal intensity. I came hard, even sprinkling a little.
Sometimes he ejaculates when he comes and other times he climaxes without actually ejaculating. This time he climaxed thoroughly but without cumming, even though I kind of enjoy it when he pulls out and cums all over my ass.
We both had to lay there and catch our breathe before getting up to clean ourselves. Eventually I left to go home and prepare for work and he left to prepare for a family event.
I've got to see him since but I haven't had a chance to fuck him since.... regardless of how bad I've wanted to. I've dreamt of surprising him with a quickie before or after work. Even this dream of a love making session over two weeks ago led me to wake up with the most amazing need to satiate myself which I did before rising for the day.
I have a long distance male internet friend who tells me that Sean knows how I feel about him. That he knows I'm quite infatuated. When I voiced my doubts that Sean truly knows these things, then he said, "if he hasn't figured that out, god help him... and you".
